Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
