So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
