So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
