we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
You may now shotgun with the bride
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Randomize
