Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
