My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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