The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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