whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
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