Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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