Please, let me fuck your mom
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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