I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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