jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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