awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
