we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
