The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!