there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?