Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
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