She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
where are you?
Hypothermia
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize