how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
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