hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
