Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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