yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Randomize
