She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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