the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I have demons in me.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
