ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Randomize