My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
