You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
