brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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