If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
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I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
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You're a waste of cheezeits
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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