my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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