Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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