quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
So many bounce houses so little time
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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