I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
