Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
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just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
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He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity