the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
