he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Your penis caused this!
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize