were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize