This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
