I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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