You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
