if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
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