Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
