haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
