please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
All I want is dick and wine.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
