She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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