And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Randomize