I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
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Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
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You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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