omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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