so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I stole a fireplace last night.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize