did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
