Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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