if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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