I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
